How to Be a Leader
I recently had the privilege of attending a Dale Carnegie course. It was one of the better training experiences I have had. Much of the training in influence today is based on personality assessments, and trying to tailor one's argument to one of several personality types. This can be counterproductive, because you have to train yourself to identify the various types, then to tailor your message to each of them. And what happens if you are presenting to several people at once, and they are different types?
The reason How to Win Friends and Influence people has been so successful for so long is that the tools outlined in the book can be universally applied. After the training, I decided that I could reinforce the teachings by doing homework. The first set of posts was collected in "How to Become a Friendlier Person." The next set presented Carnegie's tips for How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking. The last in his series is How to be a Leader, and includes the following posts.
- Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
- Call attention to people's mistakes indirectly.
- Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
- Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
- Let the other person save face.
- Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. "Be hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise."
- Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
- Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to fix.
- Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.
There is a good deal of overlap between the principles, which is another way they can help to reinforce each other. I continue to try to practice them and have benefitted from writing these articles. I hope you have found them useful too.
Photo by G. Cacakian